Tag: ireland

A Westmeath Man (Comedy)

A wooden rowing boat moored at a stone jetty on a calm, misty lake.

My dear readers, I was given the most terrible insult the other day, that I wasn’t a proper Westmeath man. Why, you may wonder? Well, I didn’t watch the Westmeath v Wexford match on TV about two weeks ago. Apparently, if I had then, maybe I could have willed Westmeath to victory with my special powers.

We’ll forget for now that I was born in Dublin, my parents grew up in Offaly, and a grandparent from Cork. Important facts when one of those counties is in with a chance of an All-Ireland.

And this grave insult came from my friend, who is known by the moniker BobDTraitor. Only on my phone, mind you. I’m not evil. How did he get such a name? Well, ladies and gentlemen, think back to that glorious day in 2004, when Westmeath won Leinster for the first and only time. Surely, you would want to celebrate with your people, not off at some random party with Dublin people. Poor life decisions, I’d say. And treachery.

What is it about Westmeath I love so much? Is it the people? The people from Kinnegad with their funny accents, those squinting windows in Delvin, or even people from Athlone, who lack souls according to the good people of Mullingar.

This is about pride of place, I reckon. I’ll be friends with people from all over the world, even from far-off places like Nigeria, Meath, Poland, and Monaghan. We’re all humans.

So maybe it’s the great wilderness in the County, you know, out there by Castlepollard. Or what we call the Great Lakes, midlands, and Irish style.

Maybe to be a Westmeath man, you have to be just like me.

And to the Westmeath football and hurling teams – I’ll try better next time.

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Galway Girls (Part 4)

The first part of the night was to go and meet Sean in a pub called Roisin Dubh (Dark Little Rose) where we will see a comedian. It’s a ten-minute walk from the hotel, mostly along pedestrian-only streets. Buskers line the streets giving the busy streets a vibrant sense of festivities.

We’ve been to Roisin Dubh before. I want to use my brain to see if I remember the route but Ronan has much more confidence in his phone. And let’s face it, when it came to the crunch there was always going to be one winner.

The Corrib was in full majestic flow as we crossed over it. It wouldn’t want to rise any higher or it might take the bridge with it. We were getting close now and it wasn’t long till we reached the pub. There was a step up into it, so the barmen went to get a wooden ramp. Still, the footpath was narrow and it took some exquisite driving to get on the ramp to get up the step. But there was no way I would fail with the taste of vodka now so close.

There was no sign yet of Sean inside. The bar area is very small so there was nowhere for him to hide.

Galway Girls (Part 3)

The traffic grew as we approached our destination. Galway is full of quaint, narrow streets. They give it a sense of place and improve walkability. But, they can get gridlocked during busier times.

It’s now that we start looking out for a parking spot, preferably a wheelchair spot but we’ll take what we can get. We’ve done this journey a few times previously so we know where to look. Incredibly, the rain stops and a parking space is free just as we approach the hotel. I hope this is a good omen for the night.

We are staying in the Imperial Hotel, its location is ideal for someone with limited mobility, with everything of importance close by. It is also the only hotel in a central location with a lift where wheelchair users can stay. The reception area is rather plain and dull, with just non-descript chairs for people who wish to sit. We are met by a smiling receptionist who says, that she hopes we will enjoy our stay in a strong Galway accent.

We head up to our room, which is very spacious but clammy. I tell Ronan that I call dibs on the double bed. Part of me wants to lie down for a while but Ronan is anxious because we running late for the comedy gig so it’s just a quick trip to the toilet and spruce up for me.

A Covid Romance (Pt 1)

Serena shuffled from side to side in her bed, restless and unable to sleep. Normally, she would have no problem sleeping but usually, the News didn’t have her so fearful. The images from Italy kept going through her mind; the faces of people gasping for breath. China had been a distant place in her mind, but Italy really wasn’t that far from Ireland. Ireland played them at the rugby each year and Irish people regularly went there on holidays. She knew that from work. It was inevitable that the virus would now reach here now. She tried to stop thinking about it, it would do her no good as she needed to work the next day.

Despite her difficulties sleeping, she made it into work. It was tough to work behind a bar when you are tired though. The place was bustling as usual with orders for food and drink flying in. But the same topic of conversation was at every table. At one point a chill went down Serena’s spine when she heard that a whole region in Italy had just gone into lockdown. She felt like she had been transported into a horror movie.

The first thing she did when she got home was to turn on the news to see the latest developments. Things were indeed as bad as she had feared. The Chief Medical Officer of the country Dr. Holohan said that it was now only a matter of time before there was a recorded case in Ireland. Serena’s thoughts turned to all the people who were about to die. She thought of her vulnerable neighbours. An elderly couple lived on one side of her and a guy in a wheelchair lived on the other side. She hadn’t interacted with them much till now but she resolved to call into them that night to let them know that she was there if they needed anything. It was the least she could do and it would take her mind off worrying about herself. At least, she would be doing something.

She went to the elderly couple first. Their names were Alan and Mary, both in their late seventies. And wow, could they talk. At first, about the virus then about their grown up children and finally about the forthcoming warm summer they were praying for. Finally, Sabrina managed to say her goodbyes, promising to check in on them if things deteriorated.

Then it was time to check in on the man that lived the other side of her in a row of bungalows. She didn’t know much about him and had only every seen him in the distance since she started renting her house three months previously. It was a very different experience. She buzzed the doorbell and waited. Just as she was about to leave the door opened slightly.

“Sorry, do I know you?”

“Oh! My name is Serena. I’m from Poland but I live next to you.”

“Oh right! Sorry, didn’t recognise you. Hope you don’t mind but I’m in quarantine with this virus and all.”

“Yes, that is why I am here. In case, you need anything. All you have to do is ring me. Okay?”

With that, she put a crumpled page with her name and number on it through the letter box sensing he didn’t want her close.

“Bye, don’t forget to ring if I can be of help!”

“Ehh, thanks.”

With that, she left.